The Excited State of Bidding Goodbye and Saying Hello
Earlier, on my way to Ortigas, I suddenly found myself looking on the east side of the bus. The days pass by me like the breeze, and it's mid-october already. Dati, I look on the west side, and I still can remember vividly everything. It was a nice chapter of my life, and at this very moment, I'm ready to close that part of me. I'm looking east. Yes, I am. And I'm missing east. I can't wait to go there. Oh how I wish the east would want me as well. And if it did, I'll make sure, to grab it with both hands, and embrace the beauty that I once enamored. I'm back. I am. Yey!Labels: -ber, Happy, Mid-October, Thoughts
Seven Severities
Uh. Updates? Hmmm.. For wednesday, everything went to a slow. The day waaaas slow. But it was relatively fine. Just a few disappointments. *sigh* What do I expect?1. Yay. Just had a minor argument with an overseas aunt. Tsk. Over the phone. Details would be spared from divulgence. It was, uh, normal naman. I mean, I had to assert myself. And weave a bunch of lies. She was a bit stern, but I kept on convincing myself and her for the reasons of my stay. I just felt a bit bad that all was in the works already, only one was pending. Ayan ha. 2. Finished some papers. And started working on my last project. Uggh. It drained me. 3. It would seem that the funds I am expecting would be delayed. I'm running low! Wahaha. Lately, I coerced myself to do a little audit of my expenditures, followed by a few grimaces. And I throw some of the receipts. One time, my mom saw them, and went to her rare monstrosity. 4. Speaking of my Mom, we haven't been much into speaking terms lately. Must've been that incident. She accused me for being arrogant. Haha. I think that was funny. It must be true. Ayus lang. Ma, I miss you. And 'wag na kasi paranoid, ok?5. I went ballistic a while ago. The 1-km stretch that is the Alabang Rotonda did it. The traffic! It rivals EDSA! I was gaping at the horror of staying for almost an hour inside the jeepney. See 1km. There's no logic. And here's my favorite part. When I finally decided to walk, guess? The vehicles moved. And voila. No traffic. Another evidence of planetary conspiracy. Makes me wonder. 6. Learnt of a news. Gaaad. 7. Earlier this morning, Jerico got me into thinking, and it made me extremely weak. My knees were literally trembling. Haay. Saka na yan. Feeling ko, mauulit na naman ang trahedya ng highschool. Labels: -ber, Confusions, List, Mid-October, Updates, Weak
The Leave-er and the Leave-ee
For the past months, it never ceased to amaze me, I mean, the wonders and the bonkers of the thought of someone leaving ahead of others. I've always been fascinated with how people cope with this one, and particularly shattered, of course, when bonds tightly kept are abruptly cut. I'll share with everyone these lines from a blog I used to visit."...naisip ko lang kanina, napakaswerte ng mga taong umaalis. kahit mapipilitan silang iwanan ang mga mahal nila, may bagong lugar upang bumuo muli ng panibagong buhay. ngunit paano naman ang mga naiiwan? ang hirap gumising na lamang at mapapansin mong pareho parin lang buhay. eto parin ang buhay na kinagawian mo. ang tanging nagbago ay wala na siya. narito ka parin sa lugar na makapagpapaalala sa'yo ng mga sandaling kasama mo siya. mahirap lalong lumimot, bumitaw at kumawala sa mga alaalang pumapako sa'yo sa mahal mo..."Everytime I come across this one, I feel a pang hit my stomach. It seems that the writer has an inexplicable wanting for that someone already bound to leave. Tsk. Attachments. Too much victims in this world already. More members, eh?Sometimes, I would tell Jerico the sadness of the person leaving. I think it surpasses even the sum total of those who would be left behind. When Johann left the trio, we were devastated. But I think it was more for him. For a single person, it would be too much to bear. Time would tell that these people would grieve, and then, time would heal the wounds, and then, they forget. They could regroup, and bond even more. As to the one who left? A new environment, a new start, a new everything. Start from scratch.Nabibigyan ng pagkakataon yung mga naiiwan to seek solace from one another. They could still be in normality since they still have one another, just minus one. It's rather sad that the solution to every ache and pain has to be forgetting. And with that, the person associated with it.It's quite funny that people make up for lost time just to compensate. Rosa, it's sweet you've gone out of your way just to express sentiments. I thoroughly appreciate that. And don't worry, for the person you are addressing in your journal, you are one of the reasons why the other side has to be considered. Don't worry about our pact. I'm sure, you could do it.I'm just waiting for the verdict......And the words of that one person recently wielding the single biggest influence in my life. I will be hanging on to these..Labels: -ber, Journey, Mid-October, Sadness, Thoughts
The Odds are Insurmountable
grabe. grabe. grabe.Napakabilis ng mga pangyayari. I wish I could avert the would be happening. Sa ilang linggo, magbabago na ng tuluyan ang lahat. Sa mga nasaktan ko, sa lahat ng mga pagkukulang. Kung iresponsable man ako. Kung ginawa kong impyerno yung buhay ng iba. Pag may pinagtataguan man ako. Sa lahat ng tinakasan ko. Pasensya na. Sa lahat ng kaibigan, mga napamahal. Mga dumaan. Mga dumating, at umalis, isang napakataos sa pusong, "salamat." Kaasar. Hindi man lang natupad yung pinakaaasam ko na mangyari. "Gusto ko, ikaw ang kasama ko sa araw na yun. Ikaw ang gusto kong huling makita. Ihatid mo ako." Salamat. At magandang gabi.Labels: Mid-October
